An Unopened Letter To The World

An Unopened Letter to The World

If I could be all that I have wanted to be, I’m sure that it would never be enough for anyone’s standards. I am sure that I would never be able to please anyone. Perhaps it’s just that I’m different, that I’m not easy to understand, and that scares anyone who meets me. I am not what you’d expect.

If I could say everything I have wanted to say, I’m sure that it would never be enough for my own standards. I could never tell the world what I need to tell them. I could never help them commit to memory what I’ve learned. Because it is killing me inside, and no one would expect that from me.

If I could be everything he wanted me to be, I’m sure he would once again forget me. H would once again be dissatisfied at my intrigue because he wants things to be easy for him. He wants what he can’t have because he is not willing to work for it. His lust for love is not satisfied because he knows not what love is and the work that is involved. The forgiveness that is given. Maybe that is why he knows not that I love him. Or perhaps this is not love, maybe it is just lust for what I can’t have.

If I could be labeled as one thing, I know it would not be the label of average. I won’t be labeled as average. Because that is not who I am. I am completely different and I want the world to know that. But they will never know, as I have fallen in love with the silence, the ink from my pen is now dry.

So the world will never know that...


i am not: who you’d expect
i love: love

i hate: the world sometimes

i hope: even though i am a failure

i crave: love .

i cry: when I am lost

i care: about...

i always: wonder why god loves me

i long to: be a missionary

i feel alone: alot

i hide: from the world

i write: what god is teaching me

i breathe: in god's presence

i play: a game that i am losing

i miss: the days when i could breathe

i search: for truth

i learn: to fall in love with the silence

i feel: content with where god has me

i know: that whatever God does it shall be forever

i say: what I think

i succeed: miserably

i fail: without Christ.

i wonder: what this will all mean in the end

i want: for only god to be pleased with me

i worry: that what i am isn't good enough

i have: hope

i give: what I can

i fight: the pain

i need: nothing a human can give

i am: a failure with a hope

i think: alot

i can't: tell you how i feel